Not Today

I don't want to do this today,
I don't want to hear your lies today.
If we leave it all unsaid,
I can pretend this never happened instead.
Remember when I asked you to stay?
Remember how you were able to just walk away?
That was the day that I put back up the wall...
That was the day I realized that I don't matter to you at all.
So, now you pop back into my life...
So, now your words cut me like a knife.
You lied.
I cried.
I said enough...
I made myself be tough.
It hurt me so much to watch you as you walked away,
It hurt me so much to hear the callous things you had to say.
And it makes me mad
That after all of this, I don't want to make you sad.
Why am I affording you a luxury that you did not give to me?
I don't want to hurt you...it's the only way I know how to be.
You say you miss me. I'm sure you do.
If I were you, I'd miss me too.