I know I've been AWOL...I have been retarded busy! I have to do a presentation next weekend on starting your own business & public speaking is so not my thing...so I am working hard on that. Ok, seriously, just the thought of it makes me want to vomit. Not cool. Anyhoo...let's talk current events. How about that SLORE (yeah...SLORE...that's a cross between a SLUT & a WHORE. Oh, yes, Bitches. Google it...it's a real word. Do you love it or do you love it?!?) in Orlando who won't tell the po-pos where her little girl is. She so killed that kid. Sad. At least they finally brought formal charges against her. Pictures have surfaced of her grieving, um I mean partying AFTER her daughter was "missing". Check this one out:
On the celeb front...pretty quiet, but... Christina Applegate has breast cancer. Sad.
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt were so upset by footage of the earthquake in China, that they're considering adopting a Chinese orphan -- maybe even two(!) -- claims Showbiz Spy.
I hope this is a rumor, because, dude...WTF? Enjoy the Wonder Twins for a while!
Speaking of twins...Lisa Marie Presley is prego with twins. Does anyone even give a s**t? I don't.
More importantly...what's in the water in Hollywood? Are they drinking a new brand infused with IVF (In Vitro Fertilization...duh)?
But according to Angelina the Wonder Twins were conceived the good old fashioned way:“If they had been conceived by IVF, we would have been happy to discuss it. But we have been fortunate never to have had fertility problems.” By that she means: "Not only are we perfect and Mr. & Mrs.
but Brad has super sperm, Haters!" If I didn't love her, I'd hate her...LOL!
Look at her...she's A-MA-ZING! Can we say "girl crush"? And...while we are the subject of twins...let's turn our attention towards one of the Tiny Twins. From ETonline.com: A law enforcement source tells ET that Olsen is asking for immunity before agreeing to speak with the Drug Enforcement Agency, but authorities have obtained a subpoena that could force the actress to appear in front of a grand jury if negotiations fail. On Monday, Olsen's lawyer released this statement: "Despite tabloid speculation, Mary-Kate Olsen had nothing whatsoever to do with the drugs found in Heath Ledger's home or his body, and she does not know where he obtained them. Regarding the Government's investigation, at Ms. Olsen's request, we have provided the Government with relevant information including facts in the chronology of events surrounding Mr. Ledger's death and the fact that Ms. Olsen does not know the source of the drugs Mr. Ledger consumed. We don't know the source of the information being quoted in the media regarding the Government's inquiry, but these descriptions are incomplete and inaccurate."
Seems shady to me that MK wants immunity. Does she have something to hide? She's a weird little thing anyway. I'll keep you posted.
Morgan Freeman was in a bad car accident. From TMZ.com: "the car actually flipped several times on the very narrow road made slick from heavy rain, and the 1997 Nissan Maxima came to rest upright in a ditch eight inches deep with water. Freeman was initially unconscious, says the person who found him, but was talking with paramedics afterward."
Ummm...Why the f**k was Morgan Freeman driving a 1997 Nissan Maxima?!? Can't ol' boy afford a better whip? Weird, right?
Holy Money Maker, Batman! 'The Dark Knight' broke yet another record by surpassing the $400 million mark in just 18 days, distributor Warner Bros. said today. Previously 'Shrek 2' held the record by passing the $400 million mark in 43 days. Dayum!
Wanna see Eva Mendes (almost) naked? Click here: http://www.secretobsessioncalvinklein.com/en/advertising/#pagewanted%3Dlanding%26 You're welcome!
OMG! News on Madonna's new tour-the set list has leaked!
According to MadonnaTribe, here are things as they stand now:
Intro/Candy Shop
Beat Goes On
Human Nature (AND I'M NOT SORRY...LOVE IT!)
Vogue (VOGUE, VOGUE, VOGUE-YAY!)
Video Interlude - Die Another Day
Into The Groove (BOY, YOU'VE GOT TO PROVE YOUR LOVE TO MEEEE...LOVES IT!)
Heartbeat
Borderline (KEEP ON PUSHING ME OVER THE BORDERLINE...HOORAY!)
She's Not Me
Music (HEY, MR. D.J.! YIPPEE!)
Video Interlude - Rain/Here Comes The Rain Again (AND I SAY...NEVER GO AWAY...OMG!!)
Devil Wouldn't Recognize You
Spanish Lesson
Miles Away
La Isla Bonita/Lela Pala TuteDoli Doli (Live interlude - Romanian folk song)
You Must Love Me
Video Interlude - Get Stupid (About saving the planet)
4 Minutes
Like A Prayer (SERIOUSLY...ONE OF MY FAVES...OH JUST LIKE A PRAYER...NO WAY!)
Ray Of Light (I'M FLYING...GET OUT!)
Hung Up (LISSY LOVES THIS ONE!)
Give It To Me (Finale)
I am a total Madonna freak, um I mean fan. Love her! Lissy & I are going to see her in Miami in November...can't wait! Good thing my BFF will be right there with me flying her Madonna Freak flag!!
Yesterday was National Friendship Day, and in honor of that, here are some quotes about friendship:
A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your heart. ~Author Unknown
"Friendship isn't a big thing - it's a million little things." ~Author Unknown
"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you."~Winnie the Pooh
"My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me."~ Henry Ford
"A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out." ~Grace Pulpit
"A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails." ~Donna Roberts
"If a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it." ~Edgar Watson Howe
I know all of these things to be true because I am lucky enough to have a BFF like Lissy :)
And...on the flipside...here's an excerpt from a new book "Friend or Frenemy?" that I am so buying:
"It’s Not Me, It’s You: The Frenemy’s Favorite SayingsYou were always a believer of your mother’s "sticks and stones" mantra — that is, until you encountered your frenemy. She doles out compliments with a backhand that would make Maria Sharapova jealous and always manages to say something that gets under your skin. Here are some of her more memorable lines:
You look tired.
I’m sorry you feel that way.
You’re going to eat all of that?
Well, he’s not exactly my type, but you might like him.
What did you do to your hair?
I’ll just have a salad with balsamic vinegar on the side.
Those shoes are so...you.
Your nose/weight/teeth/feet/hair gives you character.
It’s okay. Some of us just aren’t “relationship” people.
Things like that just don’t bother me.
I was at the gym all night.
Now, don’t take this the wrong way but...[insert some- thing that you can’t help but take the wrong way].
The movie has subtitles, so you might not get it.
Your ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend is sooo pretty."
Click on this link to send your friend (or frenemy) a card: http://friendorfrenemy.com/cards/
Frenemies...also known as HATEHERS...suck. Ladies, why are we so catty?!?
And...today, in politics...an important message from Paris Hilton:
See you at the debate, Bitches!
Ok...I am stupid tired, so I need to wrap this up. I will leave you with a gem from my nephew.
Lissy called me earlier this evening & said "I just wanted to share with you what the light of your life just told us"
Me: "Which one?
Lissy: "The light of your life"
Me: "Ohhhh, right. Noah"
Lissy: "I asked him if he likes his new teacher"
to which my darling Noah replied: "No. I hate her because she's fat"
Lissy said that she & Jacob were sitting there with their mouthes hanging open, flabbergasted.
But wait. He wasn't done yet.
"Fat people make me nervous." WTF?!? He's 5!!
Jacob said "I'm fat & your Aunt Niki is fat (for the record-A. thanks for throwing me under the bus & B.) needing to lose 20-30 lbs. does not qualify you or me as "FAT". I prefer "Pleasantly Plump") Do we make you nervous???"
Oy vey...where did he pick this up? Lissy says there's a troublemaker at school who must have taught this to Noah.
And later on..."Fat people are bums." Um...actually...bums can't afford food, so, no...fat people are NOT bums, Little Boy! At least the troublemaker has an extensive vocabulary for 5-I suppose it could be worse. It's just crazy because Noah is the ultimate sweet, sensitive child. I've never heard him make fun of anyone!
That's ok Noah because
On a serious note...Kim no longer works for JLFHC. She took a job with another company that we work with, so we will get to talk to her and refer to her...we'll miss her but we wish her the very best and hope that she loves her new job, and that they love her as much as we did :)
Well...that's all she wrote...
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