OMG Where Is He Already, Continued

Note to self: Boys are stupid. Throw things at them, like pineapples. They're pointy!

I have met some more winners. (You can't hear me, so let me break it down for you...insert SARCASTIC tone here!)

Mr. Liar. Self explanatory, no?

Mr. Looked So Much Better On His Profile...And by that I mean "Dude, that picture wasn't you...WTF?!?"

Mr. Compliments Galore. 1 compliment is nice. 10 compliments in 5 minutes is creepy. Seriously, it's really sweet that you like the shape of my eyebrows and my toenail polish, but maybe keep it to yourself.

Mr. I Love You On The First Night. Yeah, ok, that's believable! It was good, but not THAT GOOD!

Mr. You Know You Miss Me. I did, but now I don't.

I have to go off on a bit of a tangent here. This is my X. Sometimes I think that maybe he's just EVIL. Not really sure.

But, this is an actual IM conversation we had:

The X "You know you miss my big stick."

Me: "Actually, I don't even remember it."

The X: "I can text you a picture of it."

Me: "Please don't."

Well, that conversation made me feel all warm & fuzzy! It's really too bad that that relation-shit didn't work out, he's such a class act. Um, hi...remember me? Ex girlfriend, not former trick. Please conduct yourself accordingly. FYI, boys...don't talk to us like we're hookers unless your goal is to piss us off. So not cool!

Mr. Disinterested. You know who you are, Mr. Man, but I'll let it go b/c we haven't "re-met" yet. Just don't make it a habit (kthanxbye).

Mr. I Just Want To Be Friends...Let's Make Out. Thanks for the mindfuck, champ!
At least it's entertaining, right?

I'll say it again (And again and again)...The More Men I Meet, The More I Like My Dog(s)!
In closing, some words of wisdom...Boys Are Stupider, Send Them To Jupiter!

Sorry for all the boy-bashing, but c'mon! I'm entitled, aren't I???